Leaf has 4 years!...wait what?
That’s the truth.
4 Years
1462 days…In a row! :)
I say in a row because truth has become very important to me. I spent over a decade as what I’ve hysterically heard referred to as an “alconaut”. I would touch down with stretches of sobriety from time to time and fly back off to another planet.
It took what it took until I finally had enough. No, like REALLY had enough. I made the freeing realization that a life with alcohol in it was not one I was able to live anymore. That is MY truth.
Up until that day I learned “about” recovery tools from many programs inside and out. I learned how to use them, I could tell others how to use them and I didn’t stick with them.
There is a line from the Matrix that has a lot of meaning for me:
“Neo, sooner or later you're going to realize just as I did that there's a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.”
Sounds a lot like it works if you work it huh?
And that was it. I started to apply the tools I found here on SMaRT online some 15 years ago, but for real this time. I started to apply them even when I didn’t want to. I started to apply them even when I thought it was stupid. I started to apply them when I didn’t believe they would help. I didn’t just look at and old CBA. I updated it regularly with all the amazing new things I experienced. Try it, I dare you and pay close attention to how much those pro-drinking/con-quitting columns change. I actually put pen to paper and put the things that upset me into columns using an ABC.
And guess what, it worked. Or more specifically, I did the work in support of my own sobriety.
So most importantly if you are new, I have broken this program down in the simplest way that works for me:
I’ve told you my truth, that I am not willing to live a life with alcohol in it.
So I can’t drink on the truth.
To drink I am going to have to believe a lie.
Using the tools here helps me identify those lies.
Follow the truth and the truth sets me free.
It’s that simple.
The first greeting I ever got here on SMaRT online in 2001 (thanks Dan) has resounded in my head and has held true to this day. I introduced myself and talked about the problems I was having. The reply was, and I quote:
“The good news is it’s all up to you! The bad news is it’s all up to you! Ha!” (he stuck the “Ha!” at the end of most things if you have been around long enough to remember Dan). I’ve proved him right these last 4 years.
I promise if you are new and reading this there is nothing standing between you and sobriety other than yourself. Give yourself this gift. You can do it. Folks on this forum are here to support you. Do something to support your sobriety and do it today.
There is only one way to measure your success in recovery. If you are sober and happy about it you are doing it right!
Thanks so much to all the Smarties former and current for all the support and putting up with me when I was a pain in the azz!
With a Special shout out to (I know I’m forgetting someone not on the current member list, if you see I missed someone from back in the day shoot me a name sorry!):
Dee, yesterdaywas, LMR555, Barbless, Mo, Cody, Charlie, fenquat, Hammer, Dan, Shari, GJBXVI, Mask, JeCraw, Richard, josb, JoeB, Afrita, DonS, Wombat, Arby, AlexMBJ, I_am_Ned, melliemoo, Cdawg, Matisse44, Mindfulife, Gentoo, gregr, Claudia73, abctj, elmer, Aksue, dpowersdoc, JVB, mellie, charlies_angel, Jon, music, CarolD, Autumn, peter, Gooch, Jon_L1, Charlie_Dunver, patrick the skywiz.
Each of you has made a lasting impact on my recovery, whether you know it or not :)
To CHY – thanks for letting me in your village when I needed one.
To DangerousDan from sober musicians (in memorandum) – I’m still here bro and I’m still sober. I hope you are proud of me.
“lay down your gun belt bart, you’re out of ammo.”
Love you guys!
